Signs that you might be in an emotionally abusive relationship include; constantly being humiliated and criticized, you find yourself trying not to make your partner angry, being isolated from friends and family, having to constantly defend what you were doing and who you were with, you feel helpless, stressed and have a low sense of worth and lastly, your partner blames you for everything that goes wrong when it clearly cannot be your fault.
Listen to your own instinct. If you feel consistently unhappy and anxious after interacting with your partner, this merits a closer investigation in to what is really going on. Good relationships have conflicts, but they should be mutually respectful and not involve one person accusing the other of wrongdoing or casting insults. If you are being put down or controlled, this is emotional abuse.
Work out the details about leaving. For example, if you are married or living together, the details will include such decisions as whether you will move out or ask the other person to leave physically. If you own property together, please be sure to consult an attorney or other professionals who can give you the proper advice about your legal and financial obligations and rights.
You will feel more competent and secure in your decisions and judgments. When you are no longer subject to your partner telling you that you are worthless, incompetent, or even crazy, you will discover that you can make good decisions, and that your ways of doing things actually do work just fine.
Spend lots of time with friends and family who love and support and affirm you in positive terms. You have some serous reprogramming to do internally. Having a partner who constantly puts you down is likely to have a lingering effect, so make sure you are hearing the truth whenever possible.
Honor your emotions and expect they will bounce around a bit. Sometimes your choice may seem solid and clear, other times you may be vulnerable and start longing for some kind of security – even that of the emotionally abusive relationship. This happens to a lot of people, and is evidenced by how many people return one, two, or several times to a toxic or abusive relationship.
Take very good care of yourself. Eat a healthy diet and reduce or eliminate junk foods whenever possible. Take vitamins and supplements if needed – a food based multivitamin and fish oil are good starting points. Begin a doctor approved exercise program, and get in regular exercise, ideally 45 minutes of cardio 5 times a week.
While healing an emotionally abusive relationship, you will gradually take back your freedom both physical and mental. There is a lot of anger and frustration in any abused person like you….and it takes time to process.
Your feelings of dread and heaviness will abate. You will have the freedom to spend time with who you want, and be able to have the kind of environment you choose, without negativity and criticism.